I had to remind him that there is no "age exchange rate" between the u.s. and spain, and that 16 will always equal 16
Sorry I never got back to you. I got high. I know it sounds like a commercial or something... but its true
Just come here and visit. Enjoy the deliciousness of me being legal. Just don't think, and come here right meow. meow meow meow.
I just saw a fat chick ask the bartender to top her corona off with grenandine cuz she has a "sweet tooth" no that's diabetes fatty
I have no idea. I think this is what happens when people take drugs in the middle of the day
She just mixed her Emergen-C with champagne... Vegas here we come!
Like he and the nurses kept being so persistent with it and I just wanted to run out of there in my backless gown and yell FUCK OFF BITCHES IM OUT
I am so sorry for drunk texting you r kelly lyrics
I'm going to a one year olds birthday party to smoke weed. What has my life become.
premonition: im going to wake up covered in mashed potatoes
If he gets me coffee, cold or no I'll make him see Jesus with my mouth.
Idk what y'all are doing but I just want you to know I'm home and if I hear him say "slap it" one more time I'm moving out
long story short, the bouquet was used as a sacrificial torch
Step one: We finally agreed on an au pair that we both wanna fuck.
He ate me out on a washing machine in the 24 hour laundromat. Whoever watches that security camera footage is getting a show!
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