it's been like two and a half months. And I swear, I keep seeing walking dicks. I think I'm going crazy cause of lack of sex..
He woke up, got my bottle of water and poured it on me and then went back to sleep. Not really how I want to wake up at 2 a.m.
You don't have to believe me. My vagina knows it happened.
For gods sake, I only took one. With two nyquils. What a happy world its been today. Fulfill your obligations and then its marvelouso.
i am bringing shame upon my ancesors with my weak liver valhalla will never accept me
She was giving me head while we were in my tree house, my mom then came out to let the dog out so she stopped so I would stop groaning, was it good? You tell me
Moral of the story: always keep condoms in your bra
Lost feeling in my face, my shoe and had a nose bleed. That's not wings. Fuck red bull.
This is the beginning of the end. Testicle Tuesdays and free ball Friday are going to scar people for life
Dude that picute of your balls will haunt my nightmares
Welp, just took a tab of acid and cracked one of three bottles of champagne... Mondays ¯\\_(ツ)_/¯
Can you repeat that, but with context?
I fucked a marine... I told him it was like personal revenge and he said he could live with that and that he didn't mind being used.
I'm seriously considering starting a savings account so I'll have bail money this summer.
his mom walked in while he was eating me out. and my vag was facing the door. luckily his face was in it.
Forget Covid themed costumes. I need one that attracts a quality penis
preferably one with a six figure job and a boat
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