Turns out "bordello" doesn't mean what I thought it did.
Just checked, might have creepy crawlies. What does chlamydia feel like? Not near wireless to consult webMD.
I've been thinking about all the girls in my life in terms of applying to college.
Huh?
I guess what im trying to say is that your my safety school.
Afterwards she curled up in my dog's bed and slept there all night
How mad was your dog?
I've been watching anime, masturbating and eating nutella for three days. I hope she never comes back.
I'm 2 blowjobs away from girlfriend status....don't tell me I don't know how to have an adult relationship
She threw all the patio furniture in the pool saying she was building a castle.
This dude was wearing a "Plan B- One Step" backpack. I wonder how many more I have to buy until I get mine??
Between the booze, mechanical bulls, and penis's I think my body hates it when I'm single
I woke up to my dog puking on my bed. Looks like it was a successful night for us all.
I feel like I just gave a blowjob to a freight train.
He thought you were kidding about me peeing on my ex...and then I was like "that was one time"
By NOT going to the gym, I'm helping my future. I don't want stripping, prostitution, or porn to be viable money making options.
It can't be Friday yet, in still getting friend requests of people I don't remember from last weekend
IT'S MY BIRTHDAY. I SHOULDN'T HAVE TO DRIVE 3 HOURS FOR BIRTHDAY SEX.
Randomize
