I just accidently tagged myself in the picture of the 16 year olds spreading their legs in bikinis. Failure.
I'm in the dining hall. that same guy is here again, the one who sits alone and talks to his silverware.
i walked into his room and he was eskimo kissing his weed..
Isn't the perk of being in a relationship not having to put in effort for sex?
It's a good deal. He teaches me how to longboard, then we have sex
she made me take her to the grocery store to buy a gallon of sweet tea and a shit ton of band aids, the cashier asked if someone was hurt and she replied "not yet.."
I'm really not interested in hearing from him. Unless there is casual sex involved
All three women i have fucked in the past week are here in the same bar. Gameface, go.
Gonna go for any of them?
Thursday night girl, but friday is watching and tuesday is serving us.
some guy just burried his vomit in the sand.
I don't care if there's a party or not. I just want to be half naked in a cape with a never-ending supply of alcohol within arm's length at all times. Make it happen.
So apparently after I spilled candle wax down the front of my pants, I went to the store, bought condoms, and passed them out to everyone at the bar.
I thought they were lying to me about the condoms, until I found the receipt in my pocket.
I ran into him drunk, barefoot, at rite aid and he said I looked "stunning." Yeah, Stunningly shitfaced haha
I'm not kidding, he literally jumped in the red panda exhibit. I knew this was gonna be a good birthday.
you blew the guy with all the harry potter paraphanelia didn't you
Dude 4th of July week was our like 5th anniversary of you sending me dick pics ❤️
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