It wouldn't matter if you are Jesus Christ himself, you are not getting into the bar tonight
I can't ever handle being "that girl" again. At least not until next semester.
You put your shot glass in your waistband and then told me how convinent it was.
Apparently you can coat check a keg.
Should we start at nine like normal people or now like alcoholics?
the remote is under the fat chick passed out on the couch. Good luck .. and may god have mercy on your soul.
You. Me. Frosting and a bed. Lets do this.
There are very few times i will succumb to laying naked on my bathroom floor. But lastnight is a resonable enough cause.
I say we start a new tradition. I came up with it all by myself. It's called work out, lay out, black out
Welcome to the south, dude. Gives the phrase "I wish you a dry ass" a new perspective.
When did it become normal to wake up in the middle of the night to take a group bathroom break and have a 10 minute discussion on where the next football game is?
I'm right down the road from AJ's old house and I'm getting mixed feelings. My vagina is remembering good dick. But the rest of me is remembering horrible times.
I'm worried about how taking care of my mom's dog while being on acid will go.
When I woke up today i said I will NOT sleep with her. This morning I did the walk of shame into work wearing the same clothes... How was your Monday?
dont ever go to laser tag drunk. you will be judged.
Randomize
