They say you shouldnt they say its no good for the environment in your vagina
I was getting a bj with sports center on in the background
Da na na, na na naa
i would really appreciate it if you would stop texting my girlfriend.
i would really appreciate it if you would stop cock blocking me.
Got bored today and made list of places in apt I want to have sex. One includes opening and coming out the window.
If I die, please delete the word file entitled "Rainy Day"
he wanted me to dress up like someone from lord of the rings. I dumped him.
well it doesn't count as a walk of shame if he drops you off at your class in his golf cart
I want to see you in more than a weed delivering capacity
Oh they knew you from a bachelorette party! You were the pole?
Ohhh shit yeah that was me. Fuck. I hate myself when I do that.
I probably looked like a mental patient. I had my IV in one hand and cup of pee in the other, swaying around with a dazed grin on my face. I love vicodin.
Can we play rock paper scissor shot again? I want to black out in 15 minutes or less...
Hey remember that spam cooked in dr pepper we made? 10x better when the dr pepper is rum
Casually on the bus at 830 in the morning with a box of cheezits and a bottle of fireball sticking out of my purse....
I'm hungover during 4th grade graduation practice. I AM THEIR FUTURE.
Life lesson 8263 if drinking a beer in the shower be careful when shampooing... Tresemme flavored rolling rock sucks
You did an excessive amount of blow and then screamed "WHO THE FUCK NEEDS A LADDER?!" And then Mario style wall-jumped onto the roof. It was one of the most impressive things I've ever seen.
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