quick I need to know all the foods that the very hungry caterpillar ate
there should be a national holiday dedicated to how high i am
Two girls are now jumping in the ocean naked at 10 PM...and I was just starting to hate Ocean City
she said and I quote "NO SOUP FOR YOU!!!" and closed her legs.
You were doing downward dog and puking off my deck at the same time.
i was playing the convince him im sober game through texting. i spelled most of the words right. i hope.
My vibrator challenges you to a duel.
You picked a jagger girl up claimed her then walked out the door with her that was the last we saw of you
Two word: claymation porn. Think about it.
I don't think I can ever express my appreciation for the things you text me.
I just remember going to take a piss and looking down on the floor and thinking "that looks comfortable" and then I was out.
Correct me if I'm wrong, but did you let me pee in the grass while barking? And also, how many of you have videos?
We were just getting out tux's at men's warehouse he pulled both of the fitting room girls. I dont think he should be getting married
If you had asked me 10 years ago where I thought I'd be right now at 26 years old, I can bet you one million dollars that "tweezing out my nose hairs before I go in to get laser hair removal on my upper lip" would NOT have been the answer
It was like a single vaginal boat in a sea of one eyed monsters
because nothing says “let’s fucking rage” like getting a compensation letter and some company stock
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