u cheatin on me?
if i did i would try to upgrade babe.
He just turned on a sound machine. I need to get the fuck out of here.
someone put bongwater in my humidifier again THIS NEEDS TO STOP
I'm not going to fuck him in his Honda Fit. That's gay.
So i told him he was the 3rd i have ever slept with and then i found out he had actually slept with 5 other girls besides me. And his reply was well your number one on this hand.
What hospital were we in last night? Insurance needs to know
theres a turtle on the table. helping me eat my ramon noodles.
We're not in high school anymore. I'm not going to pretend to be impressed as he butchers my favorite songs on his guitar. I just wanted to get laid.
You tried to put a condom on my dog, then he ate it.
i think you may have a shot to cock block in a moment. just saying.
Wake up an cock block please bc these are noises i dont ever want to hear again
BTW I totally understand panda express being popular amongst the highs. I can feel the shrimp being slaughtered in my mouth. It's fantastic.
Want to go home, so casually slip my underwear in his pocket. Never seen him grin so big and say goodbye to his friends.
Not sure if creeper guy is too drunk to talk or I'm too high to listen.
I've orgasmed so many times tonight I think I've become enlightened
so we have roughly decided that hes the dude all the chicks will bang in college, just so he will do their term papers
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