i've alrwady decidided boys hate me plkease take notyes.
what
nvm
Emee failed...She used my genitals as a tampon
If my body was a temple, I pissed all over the front stairs last night..
On my list on ridiculous morning after bus rides home, still sopping wet and carrying a giant straw hat is definitely top five
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My parents just suggested that we tailgate the midnight christmas service. this is my gene pool.
She definitely pulled a diaper out of her purse and cleaned up the vodka with it, where do you meet these people?!
I was basically shocked at how calmly you accepted my violently shoving a french fry in your mouth.
I just had a horrible epiphany. I have fucked girls younger than Star Tours
This text was so worth waking up to
he was having a black light party and drinking manischewitz wine out of a three foot tall trophy he stole from mcdonald's...that's when I decided it was time to leave
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just need to stop hanging out with girls who drink wine coolers.
Friends don't brand friends with cigars. It's not how it works.
I had to break it to her that she was not in fact behind the bushes when she peed on the church last night
You gotta own your makeout pics Matt. They're like badges of honor
Blunts beyotch
What? Joints? Blunts?
I'll refer you to my previous text: "Blunts beyotch"
I swear to god, if you ever yell my name during sex with my sister again..your balls will be stapled to your nipples.
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