How come it tastes like onions whenever I go down on her?
Would you rather have a 10 inch but pencil thin penis or a 2 inch very fat one?
Fat, it's not about touching the bottom it's about raising hell of the sides.
Coffee is gods way of saying go ahead, get absolutly trashed on weeknights, I got your back
She has an album entitled "my photography", which consists of about 80 different pictures of a tractor that she took on her cell phone. I'm all for freedom of expression, but come on.
Only I could do what I did last night and feel perfectly ok working around children the next day
and yes i will spend 10 dollars on a vibrating toothbrush to masturbate but not a calculator for my test
He was like a foghorn with a huge penis.
yes, i was eatting raw cookie dough and fingering myself at the same time.... is there a problem?
"Home for the holidays" isn't clearance to fuck the recently 18 year old high schooler right?
Nope, his last birthday was.
I tried to prevent a bar fight. By convincing a guy whacked out on Molly to slap the ass of everyone who was arguing and shout "WOO" each time. I'm proud, surprised, and intrigued that it calmed everyone down so quickly...
I feel like if he almost got me pregnant once, i can at least say hi in a bar
YOU CANT FOOL THE TOILET
Just because your gf gives mediocre bjs doesn't mean I can fill that void
Why was I lying under a truck last night?
I just folded my laundry and I washed 3 pairs of underwear and 6 jizz towels. Clearly I'm quarantining right.
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