Spraying perfume on pants makes them clean right?
I'm home with mono, wearing knee high socks, shorts, a stained old shirt, and a surgical mask. He comes over ANYWAY with soup, a gas mask, billions of DVDs, and eats me out. He's either stupid, whipped, or i'm just THAT good.
I guess you don't remember pouring tequila in the dog bowl and slurping it.
no seriously, she's legit pissed i'm late to lunch because i was watching full house. there's obviously no future here.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
promise me that when we are 32, we will look nothing like Kim Zolciak. Promise me right this instant.
Don't you dare blame me for walking in one walking in on ur fuck session....u decided to fuck where we hid our booze
We had to go to his parents last night for dinner & ended up having a quickie in the bathroom while everyone else was outside smoking.. This is why we have a successful marriage.
Smoked a joint with my old camp counselor and now we're going to a strip club. There is a god.
HOLD ONTO YOUR PANTIES AND SAY GOODBYE TO THE REMAINDER OF YOUR INTEGRITY
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So our annual Dick Trip has been tentatively scheduled for the week of July 1 - 5. This years theme is "Fucking for Freedom".
Sending a pic of labia to send to the TN Legislator. Obviously they don't think I know what to do with it so I'm gonna ask them for advice.
Stay away a while longer.
Still not sure if they're cops or strippers.
New fact of life: getting Becca high never helps any situation at all ever.
Im blaming it on six shots of Jack, loneliness and a chemical imbalance. That's the best I can think of...
He's a fucking ninja- think of the things he can probably do with his dick.
Randomize