like if someone fucked a dictionary but instead of having a penis, it was just one of those leap frog educational toys
I hope to god you are high
Who keeps a bong in their car??
Kids who graduated high school two weeks ago.
Michelle Duggar likes to fuuuuck
Im sure that doesnt mean its ruined... It was your bithday you get a free "im drunk at 7 am" card
He stole her cigarettes and walked 15 miles just so he wouldn't have to wake up next to her. God I love being a lesbian.
Exactly. So he deserves crazy "thanks for keeping me out of jail" sex. Or an "I'm glad your excessive cocaine habit had some positive outcomes" blowjob.
You never cared about felonies while buying me alcohol from the little Asian woman across the street
Boob shaped ice luge is ordered for my bday. Boom
I can't even drink.
The liquor comes out the nipples. Out. The. Nipples.
It's not socially acceptable to be drunk in adult world. That fact makes me die a little inside.
Wow. Memory lane. What a horrendously unsightly jizz stain on the tapestry of life.
so, i guess i gotta chill on showing up to work hungover... someone anonymously left a bible in my work mailbox (no one else got one)
Let's get drunk and take out your tonsils tonight
you said it was a life or death situation, being your partner for beer pong doesn't count
I am playing in the snow in my bunny outfit. GET OVER HERE
you have to get here a cop came into the bar and she looks like Sarah Palin. I think I'm gonna try and bang her
Randomize
