Its like we are women, and boise state is a gangster rap song. This game is degrading
So this girl in my math class just went to the bathroom, tampon in hand, comes back with it still in her hand starts digging around in her purse, takes her thing of birthcontrol out, goes oh fuck, and downs the rest of the pills. Got to love college.
if women knew the size of my dick, theyd be much more receptive to my sloppy drunken advances
koolaid chicken. i marinated it for 2 hours and roasted it on a rock in a fire. it was bright blue and raw. but that shit was tasty
The chlamydia really affected his face.
getting up at 8am to start drinking seemed like a much better idea before I had to wake up at 8am
I want to own their dicks and all the attachments
When you're looking for your panties tomorrow, you traded them for a blunt on the train.
You played Frank Sinatra today after we had sex. You moved way up in my literal book of men. Congrats.
I just hooked up with the same bartender my dad cheated on my mom with in the 90s. Not sure how this makes me feel.
family traditions my good sir
Even his sexts are poetic. He said breasts instead of tits so I'm gonna lock this shit down asap
at that point, I wouldn't blame you because I'd be so ashamed I couldnt even have sex with myself.
I am at the car wash dressed as a turn of the century librarian
I just got offered free tattoos if I smuggle some guns from OKC to Dallas for a guy in the hells angels
My professor congratulated me on turning my assignment in early. I didn't have the heart to tell him I only passed it in early cause my sex plans got canceled for the night.
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