Bea Arthur died! :(
What?
Big bird passed.
how the FUCK am I supposed to macarena while doubble fisting?
Hey Operation Dumbo Drop... FYI, when you select your date this evening, our doorway is 3'x7'
Just made a pepperoni sandwich with cheese, mayo, and pickles. Poverty is like pot, without the happy feeling.
If we're like this now and women reach their sexual peak in their 30's, I can't even fathom what our futures hold.
when did my "fat clothes" just become my clothes...diet starts tomorrow
well the hot one passed out so thats that, but then the fat one made chicken nuggets....totally worth it
Let's get really high and wear fake mustaches and try not to laugh at each other...
Me and two guys that I made Eskimo bros all soberly slept together in my bed
BECAUSE THIS IS AMERICA AND DONUTS AND TITTIES AND ALCOHOL IS WHAT THIS COUNTRY WAS FOUNDED ON
I'm sitting on your porch drinking wine from the bottle. Just so your new neighbors know what kind of people are in the neighborhood
I basically have the attention span of a ferret on meth when it comes to men
is it fucked up if I wear crotchless panties to thanksgiving to make it easier for me to fuck my cousins friend.
God I love you.
Watch out for the bush at the end of your steps. it comes out of nowhere
I might be a bit longer... I found a hot guy at the grocery store, so I'm following him and buying stuff that he's buying
Randomize
