i'm watching degrassi (go figure) and the episode is about jimmy not being able to get a boner and now he's famous and rapping about popping pussies..i dont get it.
Went to bed at 4 in a strangers bed. woke up wearing scrubs, realized i was gonna be late for work so i just wore the same clothes as the day before... i don't have a toothbrush and im pretty sure there is leftover semen in my mouth. at some point i think i was at the beach cuz theres is sand in my underwear. i love newport already.
stephanie tanner's voice is so fucking annoying. no wonder she resorted to crystal meth.
I made a drinking game out of watching your DUI video, everytime you say " okay, well thats just your opinion"
He said "ride me pocahontas" while I was on top of him last night
I remember pointing out how smooth my legs were to try to direct his attention away from my vagina.
There's a wake for a coworker on 420 during te time of 420... Hoping everyone will be too sad to notice how high I am.
When we do our power hour over Skype I'm just going to sit on the toilet so that way I won't have to get up in the middle of it and miss any shots
Okay. thanks for sacraficing your body and risking aids for our snowcone business.
BTW send me your address and size of condoms you wish your lover was-- "if you build it, they will come"
Hahahahaha. That's what your stoned ass gets for eating half a bag of processed cheese at 2am.
When we were having sex last night, I told him I would replace him with tacos
When you're done railing that chick, there is still half a pizza and some ninja turtle mac and cheese down here if you want
Do you think they'll deliver pizza to my mouth
That’s true love. If they recognize a chocolate mold of your anus.
Randomize
