I still think it's messed up that you're naming your kids after all the guys you slept with in college
The vagina on Hilton Head is mighty fine this time of year.
New low: just got woken up by my 9 year old cousin throwing an empty at me and telling me to get my life together.
Got head last night. Had the 3D glasses on the whole time.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
im In safeway buying a bottle of Ciroc in short shorts at 3:00 pm on a Monday, yeah I don't know either.
Sext: Bring me pancakes from the midnight breakfast gathering please
OMG I WAS JUST THINKING ABOUT HOW OUR FRIENDSHIP IS SO REAL BECAUSE I SHOW YOU DICK PICS AND WE LAUGH TOGETHER.
Awwww breaks my heart, I just wanna fix his teeth and give him a blowjob.
My vagina has made plenty life decisions and I would like to point out very few if not any of them were in my favor.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The guy whose porn password I use finally renewed his membership. Lazy fucker had been slacking all summer.
I don't want my vagina anymore.
I come into the house and he's fucking doing karaoke by himself... Lady gaga
i don't know what it is about you being around kids that makes me want to screw your brains out
That is the creepiest and also the sexist thing you've ever said
i think it's like a sexual celebration of not having kids
I didn't have any choice but to cuddle you. Your hair was stuck on my nipple piercing.
“On a break” is implied when it’s a Russian chick dressed as Black Widow wearing Minnie Mouse ears
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