my mom noticed the "toothpaste" stain on my tshirt...she repeatedly attempted to get it off by licking her thumb and rubbing it. See Jenn it obviously doesnt taste that bad...
He bought me a flower. He's totally getting head every day for a week.
I'm in the bar bathroom about to pass out. But it's ok cause I set my alarm to go off for last call.
She says I'm cute and I remind her of her brother. She's too hot to back out now. I don't know. I'm guna go for it.
Paying 5 grand for boobs is saving me like 10 grand in weed
Just dont tell him. Tell him you colored your vagina for breast cancer awareness month. He will understand.
I get that he's ugly and I deserve better but I will still beat up the girls he hangs out with.
Walk back down Church toward Mass Ave. Take a right and head for the guy in a kilt on top of the really tall unicycle. C u soon!
you sternly forced jackson to start preheating the oven around midnight so you could make bagels in the morning
you were serious about those bagels
wanna come over? I have movies.
sure, what movies
porn or disney, your choice
Can't feel body but making pizza rolls
Update: He still has devil magic genitals.
I hate to be the bearer of bad news, but yours is no longer the biggest penis I've seen. It is however, still the prettiest.
Oh my god.. Saw a commercial for Captain Morgan. Made me gag a little bit.
Yo did you say we are blacking out saturday night and playing dodgeball?
Yeah for relay for life. Its for cancer
Randomize
