the chick doesn't look like she's put anything in her mouth for weeks other than his dick.
Michael Jackson had a heart attack when he found out boyz to men was a music group not a delivery service.
It's sad how good I am at giving people diseases
Is it wierd that I kind of wish I could hang out with Melissa Joan Hart?
Is it bad that now when i read ingredients in the food I eat i only read it as shrooms instead of mushrooms ?
I don't know what's worse: going to the liquor store at 9am or knowing that its open at 9am
don't be alarmed if you come back and i'm passed out drunk and naked cuddling with the franzia.
I never thought I'd say this but my vagina is taking a serious break for awhile
And I think your bro would be happy to know that when I took my bra off like 10lbs of confetti fell out. It was like my tits were celebrating being free
Ugh I hate you, and the responsible adult life I pretend to have during daylight hours
We got really stoned and then we fucked. Then he made me a panini.
Oooh, he sounds pretty classy
Actually, not at all. We were stoned so he made me a peanut butter panini. With a Rollo in the middle of it. And he left the panini press on all night. I could have died.
If my mom's not going to offer me drugs then it's really pointless for me to be here.
my confident boosted when he told me that it was I who started making out with him. ME. NOT HIM.
I AM SHOCKED AND PROUD OF MYSELF
I got my period during my acid trip. It was weird.
On a scale of 1 to alcoholic in withdrawal how ready will you be to start drinking as soon as you arrive on campus?
Randomize
