Why is it people are always in costumes on Cheaters these days? Joe Greco literally just said, "It appears they get chased by a chicken with a chainsaw." WTF?
Because its an amazing idea and you're the only one I can think of that will allow a pirate threesome
I had to carry you down because your legs weren't moving anymore but you were carrying the weights you stole from that guys room... and that's where the bruises came from.
She told me she gets scared easily and that I had to protect her. Then I made a condom joke that ended up making her cry... All bad dude
OH HAPPY DAYS YOU'RE BOTH GINGERS YOU'LL REPRODUCE YOUR OWN KIND
My arms are still sore. Apparently, lube wrestling is the best workout ever.
BECAUSE THIS IS AMERICA AND DONUTS AND TITTIES AND ALCOHOL IS WHAT THIS COUNTRY WAS FOUNDED ON
woke up to a case of keystone on my porch when I went to bed at seven that morning.. I think it's someone's peace offering for getting my roommates car towed
Aside from having sex with a rando in a toga on george's couch i think taking plan b in the library is the most hashtag college thing i've ever done
Sex should not remind me of how baby birds get fed
IDK I WAS CAUGHT UP IN THE TEQUILA SHOTS AND FRIENDSHIP
so in case you needed a ticket for the Hot Mess Express, I'm the conductor now.
He was shirtless in my yard saying he was jesus
Girl in front of me just swan dove into the middle of the carpeted hallway, stood up, clapped for herself, and then continued walking. My life is complete.
I don't know what else to tell you.. just listen to some taylor swift and you'll know what to do in the morning
Randomize
