I don't know what I could have possibly done in a past life to deserve watching my boyfriend projectile vomit margaritas and probs blood while completely naked.
Its Shannon Doherty lazy not Forest Whittaker lazy
I am drinking at a movie theater seeing a children's movie, 2nd time this week
Thank you blackberry messenger, for giving me a way to sext faster and more efficiently
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He just did blow off my nipples. He's not serious about his girlfriend.
we decided to do a scavenge hunt for ourself for when we walked back to our apartments. We hid taco bell behind some bushes. I think they are still good.
please come over and have sex with me so we can talk about prom and kill 2 birds with one condom
You fought the bouncer and lost, then challenged a hobo to a 40 chugging contest and lost. Sobriety is a good life choice.
He left his shoes, boxers and socks at my house & managed to walk home to his dorm without realizing anything was missing until 3 days after. That's the last time i'll ever hook up with a freshman.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Woke up Christmas Eve morning with my face smelling like ballsack.. No regrets.
Well, I found my bra. It's in my glove compartment with a half-eaten Snickers bar and a Jesus bookmark.
I'm going to fuck every single member of the men's olympic swimming team and no one is going to stop me
Drunk and alone at a magic show is what my life has become without you
Did we seriously just get into a fist fight over kit kats?
I wasn't supposed to sleep w him. So of course I sent him gps location to my bed.
Randomize