U know its gonna be a great day when the guy at the liquor store waves at u cause u walked by
Yes because finding a guy to give head to is pretty difficult.
I mean not really
Obviously that's why it was a joke you are so stupid it's impossible.
i told the doctor i drank a college amount of alcohol. judgemental prick
Is it bad that I had sex with another guy on my boyfriend's bed while he's out of town?
Just flip the mattress, it erases all
Done and done
Ok Ghana you win again. Tell you what...Double or nothing over women's tennis, basketball, hockey, war, baseball, golf, swimming, diving, oil spills, box office proceeds, internet porn sites, criminals incarcerated, women's downhill, bass fishing, NASCAR, or GDP?
I was giving him a handjob and he commented that he loved my nailpolish....I'm destined to die a fag hag
I just celebrated my ex boyfriends birthday by having more sex than he will today.
Yes I have a handle on life. A handle of Svedka.
Only once have I found myself in the condom aisle holding a bundt cake...
Home safe. Took me everything not to stop and pick up some random cat that looked like an ocelot tho.
She proposed we share a dildo. Hopefully she was joking.
He started to lick a stick of butter and was calling it Jennifer.
It was an all night sausage fest and I was the lady of honor.
There’s nothing that says motivation more than watching these little geniuses on Kids Baking Championship New Year’s Day. I’m ready to fuck shit up this year.
I really hope this is just a phase, because I am not capable of carrying both of our drunken whore asses through life. Too much dead weight....
Randomize
