Yeah....I really appreciate it....I didn't even get it from hooking up....lame, atleast if a girl gets u sick when u r hooking up it was fun in its inception...
So I pulled my t-shirt down, pushed my boobs up and marched right into that church!
I just farted. And everybody around me is looking at the fat girl to my left. I win.
Clearly I made an impression.
Or at least your vagina did.
apparently i was cut off before i even walked in
I don't think I have but I might've died. If I have then come get me, I'm in the flower bed. And still game.
He just kept yelling cup my balls to everyone they kicked us out after 20 min
I smell like icyhot and vodka... Heres to my pulled tendon.
Alright whatever you say... But in the future when you really wish you had a dildo don't come crying to me about it.
Uh, he still talks to you after you basically sexually harassed him using emojis?
Yeah I'd rather get obliterated at home.
Same here. I'd like to ensure that I won't get pissed on.
I woke up on a boat next to an extremely attractive man wearing nothing but a life jacket. Neither one of us owns a boat...
You are cordially invited to the annual finals week stress relief drinking binge at our manor this evening
She was on top, but I lost her at "alright, you look like predator."
I was just at the gas station and happened to look left and see a girl blowing some guy. How was your night?
Randomize
