Afterwards she curled up in my dog's bed and slept there all night
How mad was your dog?
got them to do a wheelbarrow of shame down the sidewalk after the threesome. I rule
this just has baby written all over it
I just put a tampon in while driving. Don't tell me I don't got skills.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just woke up with a bunch of French fries in my hand and a chocolate shake balancing on my pillow. Lovely.
I'm on strict orders from her to keep sleeping with you until you give her a job next summer.
I'm fighting fire with fire. When my parents interrogate me about what I was doing last night, I tell them the truth. Every disgusting, awkward detail. I'm 23 now and they need to get used to it.
She face-timed me on the toilet. My dick is never going to recover from that.
I tried to high-five the cop last night. he just looked at my raised hand and told me to go to bed.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There should be an open time period where you show each other your goods and it's totally socially acceptable to bail.
I wholeheartedly concur
I got high with the cantor. Rethinking this whole non-practicing Jew thing.
Hold your horses dude. Titty pics are a work of art.
Whose dick am I looking at? There are too many possibilities at the moment.
If by whore you mean UPGRADE....then yes I am
I just sharted for the first time in my life. Age 33. Lying in bed. Sober. 2021 is off to a great start!
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