I know it's getting bad when I wash the bong more often then the dishes
My mom just told me to drench my entire body in vodka for 20 minutes. I have never been this russian. no one has ever been this russian
i would have smoked before this dance, how ever i have surgery Monday and I looked up weed and anesthesia and fatalities was mentioned, so i decided that it would be a bad idea
probs a good idea
i like the whole idea of life and being alive
you sure you're not high?
This is the guy who showed up to the first day of class with a 24 pack of coke and a handle of rum in his backpack. He doesnt play by normal people rules.
so apparently the car got towed with me passed out in the back seat.
You're so wise. You're like my sexual Grandmother Willow.
Not a chance. She stuck her hand under my kilt and she told the whole table I was indeed commando. She broke all the rules.
I hope your perfect outfit is a slutty power rangers outfit. That's been my dream wedding since I was a kid.
I wish the sun would stop judging me for being drunk while it's still shining.
I took her to the bar and boom. All of my past slump busters were there. Shes cool enough to know what that means and said she was afraid they'd eat her so we left.
when I went into his room, he was sleeping on his stomach, almost as if to silently say, "you're not touching my dick tonight".
I love you so must. You as do fraty. You are truly my veste breakable (ties I wtf racket Andover). Luce you. Have a safe drive bio dough failover.
Figured out why that fly won't leave. It keeps buzzing through my weed smoke
Fly high, Fly.
Quit bitching. I brought you a muffin.
its a comptetion of fuckups and im HERE TO WIN
Randomize
