totally watching dr. phil and getting eaten out right now. be jealous.
yeah, but i heard shes schizophrenic
i wouldn't even care dude, i'd fuck her and all 7 of her personalities.
i was thoroughly upset that he did not want to be my number 16, who passes that number up?
He knows as soon as he hits chameleon eye status drunk, he is guaranteed to piss the bed we NEED to push him there
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
yeah, its right past the deli mart where i showed my right tit for mozzarella sticks.
Jerry just sent me this: IOR GHIT ALL THE BUTTIB. Go get him. Now.
Okay, good. And if you have one of those portable strip poles that would be nice too.
That was the first time I have seen a confused expression with a dick in the mouth
Cops came. Forced us to take the "Honk and We'll Drink" and the "Free Shots to Father's of Freshman Daughters" signs down. Before we did, someone honked and the cop said, "Aren't you gonna drink?" They then told us to move the party inside by ten.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You fell out of your barstool, I tried to help you but you said if I got any closer I'd be drinking my meals through a straw, So there you sat.
I don't really know how to explain this place...it's like I feel like I need an std just to fit in
Regardless of the amount of alcohol you may consume tonight - DON'T take anybody home
We can just chill or day drink or smoke or watch law and order marathon or play just dance 4 or watch a movie or go to the movies or play hide and seek or hug, so many options
Nothing brings compassion from a group of cafe workers like walking in and asking if they have a 'hangover special'
wait did i hook up with someone in mcdonalds last night?
Okay first of all fuck you and everything you stand for because Taco Bell is amazing.
Randomize