I wanna put my baby in that!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Ew you even made it your fb status
Ppl probably think ur having a kid
I hope
Love having children with random chicks
come over anyways, right now, right this second
it can be a super quick quicky, then you can go back to studying
wow, that sounds SO fun, please stop enticing me with premature ejaculation
bruce springsteen sings some of the most romantic songs i've ever heard.
the hells wrong with u
I don't remember him, but he's saved in my phone as "uh oh zbt"
Next time we go to the river, we nominate you to flash people for free booze. Your tits are the biggest.
By the end of the cruise, there was literally nothing in our room he hadn't peed on.
im suggesting it to him. and by suggesting i mean we're not having sex again unless im wearing high heels
Ski vacations are for hooking up with randoms. It's like I don't even know you
Ok so I didn't mean for his first impression of me to be lying face down on his roommates bedrooms floor throwing up my jäger but it happened. Atleast my ass looked good in those jeans. Think I still have a shot?
The fact that me being able to walk down stairs is an accomplishment in my books pretty much explains how I am
One does not fall in love, one falls flat on the their face after leaving a bar
he fucked me wearing a cowboy hat and made grits after
We call him Texas for a reason.
She had never heard the term "grundle" before. Classiest girl I've met in months
Was not aware that standing loudly up off the couch and loudly, drunkenly slurring "I'M EIGHTEEN NOW BITCHES" counted as a primitive mating call.
I got kicked out of the E.R. for saying "balls".
Randomize
