Just woke up naked in my storage cubby and some one rearragned my whole room?
no jk, not my room
stupid gm bankruptcy made me miss the showcase showdown
Those cock suckers. We need to know who's winning the hot tub and the vacation to the alps
Hallmark should totally make "congratulations on getting your period" cards...I feel they would be quite popular.
we were naked in his bed and he told me all about what a "baller" alexander the great was.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just saw a guy driving a atv down the highway in a tux.... only in Iowa...
Tequila bombs in champagne seemed like a good idea at the time.
Oh we're fine. I made her a "sorry I peed on you" omelet.
In your defense, I really thought capturing that alligator would have been a lot more awesome and a lot less tragic.
RIP Mr Bojangles.
I am stoned and listening to the Olympics music I downloaded on Saturday. Best 6 dollars I have ever spent.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i wore just an American flag as my costume-huge success. 20 people pledged allegiance to my ass including a senior frat boy at the keg. God bless America.
I had a really bad dream about us drinking this weekend. Remind me to tell you Friday when we start drinking
Yeah i like want to be friends with him. And if we have sex in the physics library well thats fine with me
She referred to my balls as rotund and handsome
Vodka Red Bull is like your spinach if you were Popeye
Dude on a beach in sicily and a blonde jesus just smoked us out and then tried to makeout with me I am never leaving this place
Randomize