if you don't start talking to me i'm gonna tell your gf that you said she tastes bad
my mom just asked me about sexting and if I have ever sent a naked picture to anyone. i fucking hate fox news.
Mom wants to know why I'm bringing a blender back to college.... didn't have the heart to tell her she's paying a $20,000 tuition for us to make margaritas and sleep through class
There aren't nearly as many guys masturbating on chatroulette as i was led to believe...i feel cheated
should i be impressed or disgusted that i was spitting glow-in-the-dark?
He just ordered a bottle of Beam at an Italian place for us to share.
I'm naked in the window of the hotel and I feel like I'm walking in slow motion like a robot
MANGO MOTHERFUCKING GODDAMN MARGARITA DELICIOUSNESS
Omg do you remember last night you kept pointing to your vag asking who wants to play this like a fiddle hahaha
Guess who just got caught by mall security having sex in a car in the parking lot... at noon. This chick.
If we accept the love we think we deserve do we also accept the sex we think we deserve?
You were asking her how her mother would feel if y'all dated, etc. And I was yelling at you your girlfriends name over and over again in between gags and sobs.
I told the person I was on the phone with to hold on while I looked for my phone. I think it's time to stop doing dabs.
He took my Spanx off and still fucked me twice. I call that success.
a reward? ill think of something
if its not drugs or food I swear to god ill throw a fit
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