Are u religion class? I'm on my way, I have cum in my hair. tell u later.
Hot guy, man whore rep, huge crush, alcohol that will fuck you up. I fail to see how this could go wrong
thank you for introducing me to everyone on chat roulette as I was passed out.
I wonder what a non-hungover friday at work is like
You refused to get in the cab so we rock paper scissored to decide who walked you home and the fat guy was it. So don't blame your poor hook-up choice on me; it was all you.
It was awkward at first he now knows I fucked his little brother, they were both there. then the tequila kicked in and everything was fine.
I am the slutty bisexual glue that holds this friendship group together.
he forgot we were at my place and not his so he tried kicking me out of my own apartment by saying "so, you can go whenever you want...."
She sleeps with her hand around my balls. First I thought it was just a comfort thing. Now I think it's to make sure I can't slip away in the middle of the night.
No seriously you guys are gonna get arrested
Do me a favor I want you to reach down the front of your pants and underwear and just feel around for a while... if you happen to find your balls then join us
Just text him and be like do you want this pussy or not. You have three seconds to respond.
She was drunk at Red Robin. She asked for more fries and then shoved them in her purse while saying "Come on bitches, you're coming with me" to them.
He passed out before we could have sex. I had no choice but to use his boner to hold my onion rings.
Hey I had a great night last night but I don't want to lie to you I'm only 19 and that wasn't my place its was my cousin he's gone for the summer and I was just house sitting and watching his cat I'm sorry
I don’t know what language he speaks but I know my boobs will translate just fine
I’m looking forward to few days of international relations
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