Try denying you're gay when "I'm Not A Girl, But Not Yet A Woman" comes on Shuffle.
i prefer some hard alcohol, but wine makes me feel less of a progressive alcoholic
Bad news is I found gravy in my nightstand again.
Ok see being that I'm not present or participating your vague texts "neeeeed that" and "vagina" leave a lot to question.
you'll be horrified to know he's visiting next weekend
You two are a rollercoaster of sex and silence.
They told you that you couldn't fit in the dryer. Man, did they eat their words. You did brake the door though.
I think my vagina is phsycic. All day it tingled and then BAM Channing Tatums look alike fucks me like ive never been fucked in my life.
so my pro life roomate found a used condom wrapped up in her sheets with your panties. never letting you have sex in her bed again
Turns out floaties are a great thing after a couple bottles of vodka
I bet yours is gonna be filled with secret innuendo.
secret innuendo and cervical punches to the world.
It's like those toothpaste commercials where 4 out of 5 dentists would recommend your vagina
How do I figure out the name of this sleeping naked guy in my bed?
My hookup from last weekend apparently got arrested today... his roommate just tagged me on facebook asking for bail money.
Is it in poor taste to drop acid before midnight mass?
I love this.
Was cussing out our DD when one of the strippers takes him backstage. WTF
They call him magic hands is all I know.
Somethings are best left a mystery
Randomize
