Gayer than 8 guys blowing 9 guys
wow, that really makes you stop and think.
I justed realized that the word 'turd" is present in saturday
sometimes i wonder what i would do without sheltered catholic girls w/ overprotective parents
never have sex?
Went to the career fair today..I handed out many resumes to find out later that they say I have a bachelor o farts degree...Top that.
thanks so much for stopping me from telling him i want to have sex with him while i proceeded to hookup with the air.
I'm playing a little game called "how many shots of jack can I take before I become a shit show tonight". All front row seats are sold out.
I remember desperately screaming that I love my life and running in zig zags all the way home
I woke up on karas dogs bed. Lets evaluate our lives.
Telling someone to make good decisions on a Thursday is like telling Santa to be Jewish.
If I get to the point of singing Man of Constant Sorrow then please god let me do it, record it, then cut me off.
I want Samuel L. Jackson to stand beside me and narrate my morning shits.
I want an apology pizza with SORRY IM A DOUCHE spelled out on it in pepperoni
My liver is screaming fuck you right now.
I'm really sorry I bit your mom last night, it was completely uncalled for.
You fist bumped my dick last night saying good game. That you'll be back for the 2nd game...
Randomize
