I'm buying this stripper a house, I don't care what her name is.
I just watched Jersey Shore so I would know what rock bottom was when I reach it.
im pretty sure every drug dealer is going to be able to retire the day after alice in wonderland comes out
remember.. you're not a homewrecker.. you're just creating options for him..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
definitely not taking the whole return culture shock so well...drinking a 100 proof rootbeer vodka float out of a german beer mass
I wanna get freshman fucked up and do shady things on the last Friday of my youth.
seis de mayo is my least favoite holiday because i usually spend it in bed sobbing over my poor life decisions from the night before.
I think I should start a match.com profile and put "robe lounging" as my only hobby
Like sorry you chose to have an attractive girlfriend dude
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Everyone is out there getting real jobs and I just realized I've been "washing" my clothes with fabric softener for two months.
I'm pretty sure that's why we have such good sex because we are secretly trying to kill each other
So what if I got a tattoo on a bus, it was sterile.
Are ropes allowed in during conjugals?
Shotgunning beers in the shower. Mom would be proud.
Looking back, we probably shouldn't have chased alcohol with more alcohol
Randomize