u downloaded tardy 4 the party
then u started screaming about not wanting nene on the record
I'm on the strip, it's like a mini new years eve. Some girl just got taken away on a stretcher with her meter margarita in her hand claiming it's trophy for being awesome. Damn tourists are lightweights.
tried unsuccessfully for 10 minutes to do bong hits while wearing glow in the dark vampire fangs before realizing air was getting out of the sides of my mouth
we marched down beaver avenue with lit tiki torches humming the olympics opening song.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Im just saying it can't be that bad if he drove himself to the er. We'll head that way when we finish playing scattergories
You pulled me aside and handed me a plastic childrens' tea cup full of 151 and said "trust me its a great idea"
We would have taken you home with us, but you were outside the bar measuring a randoms stream of piss by walking along side it... you said you were only at 32 feet and it still had a couple of grooves to hit.
i need to stop celebrating other people's birthdays like they are m own.. my body can't handle a birthday every week
A talk about Arizona woman's rights politics has never turned to sex so quickly before.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was wondering why he was in my phone as "Cat Guy", he seemed pretty normal. Then when we woke up he was wearing a shirt with a picture of his cat on it. The name stays.
If your gig isn't over in 30 minutes I am coming on that stage to come on your dick.
A unicorn in pinstripe pants just got on the J at Dolores stop. It can only be a good night
WHY IS THERE A GOLD FISH IN MY BONG??
I'm pretty sure the Bible says "He who is most sober may cast the first stone."
You have a penis. Therefore everything you say is automatically wrong.
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