i wonder if i could find a boyfriend who would call me big papa
sure if you go to prison
Too much gin, very little bucket
I literally sat down and peed with my underwear still on. How does that happen?
Getting wasted on top of a casino. My penis is so much higher than everyone else's right now.
and you wish you could be eating a cookie right now. but all you get to eat is a penis
Cuz its complicated and I hate complicated and I miss your penis
Just took a shot of tequila with a random guy at the supermarket. Happy cinco de fourth.
She just causally held my limp dick in her hand the entire movie. Her parents were cuddling on the couch too..that brave!
okay when i look at this i can see it on the future news along with the headline "picture scandal involving senatorial candidate sexually harassing drunken idiot in what appears to be a pink room of pain"
I was thinking that, but I'm not sure the proper etiquette on asking about someone's nipple rings. Even if you did see them and compliment them once.
the last time I drank tequila I ended up riding your skateboard nude down the street... so yeah, I'll have a few shots.
My boobs are numb because I've been using them as stress balls
You were drunk at 5 You went to the dining hall and cried because your brain and fingers weren't working. Your RA came up to you and suddenly you became sober. I was very proud of you.
And I just got smacked in the face by my cat. Apparently I'm supposed to be awake now.
there were rolls with just one bite out of each one leading to the bedroom. you were laying on the bed naked and yelled 'you did it you followed the bread crumbs!'
Randomize
