not only are you not the girl i fell in love with, but from the looks of it, you ate her
I really like him. That's why I'm having sex with someone else, so he doesnt think i'm a slut.
i signed up to donate 10 dollars a month to help the children that are being displaced in columbia because of the drug wars.. i felt obligated
So how does it feel getting boo'd by the entire 5 guys restaurant
Sorry for drunk singing "love hurts" to you at 3 am.
Walt I've been the third wheel taking shotssssssssssssssssolo. Each s is for each solo shot.
Where are you? This girl fell on a baby. She is just gone. Please Hurry
I'm hurrying
Dude. She just shit herself.
It's official, no more fat chicks or even close to that, my balls are 2 dimentional
Like really my mothers day gift is a pic of his dick
I'm having salsa con queso and a leftover half-drank/flat red bull for breakfast. Nothing you propose doing today would be a downgrade.
i made the walk of shame wearing her booty shorts that said juicy on the back. i'm still counting it as a good night
I threw a dessert topping at a baby tonight so drink up! If you stay sober tonight I will be very disappointed in you.
So the bar crawl I'm on is a "90s bar crawl" and I made the joke about a few overweight girls that "lack of concern for your weight is so 90s" it did not end well
All I could think about was how many vaginas had been on the toliet that I was pukin in
Okay. Did I say I did anything unusual? Because I usually do weird stuff. Did I clean mirrors? My mirrors are really clean, and I think I remember having windex..
Randomize
