what ever happened to devon sawa?
fuck...who knows?
i'm really worried about him.
Dan is more possessive of me than a Michael Jackson is of McCully Caulkin
was*
True, R.I.P.
Im interpreting your silence as a silent plea for me to come wake you up. See you soon.
Apparently one comment in my womens studies class cockblocks yourself for an entire semester.
Let me just say....i'm sorry about setting your carpet on fire. I had no idea that the paper towel would burn that quickly.
Can you explain to me the broken disco ball in my front yard?
4 girls bringing me taco bell. this is what dreams are made of.
Sitting in the library studying = googling how to get laid in the library.
Welcome to the first annual slutathon and let the men be ever in our favor
I made my own utility belt like Batman. It has a cup holder for my beer, cell phone holder, a little pocket for condoms, and a sewing kit just in case.
There is a hatefuck that has the destruction level of an atom bomb raging through my viens just aching to vaporize her.
her wearing orange crocs at the bar was definitely a great form of contraception
Oh my god, I totally forgot we call your penis "Godzilla's Tail".
you really need to remember next time not to write your name and phone number on the paper its wrapped in.
But what if it got lost?
its illegal. you dont want people to contact you if they find it.
All I did today was eat pizza and use my vibrator.
Randomize
