This is my last and worst hangover of the decade...I almost cherrish it
She accidentally pre-ordered us Dominos for the next day at 11:30am... we were very confused when we woke up.
I just texted him to come over because I want to see if his hand fits the handprint bruise on my ass.....I feel like the cinderella of S&M
frankly if you're gonna get kicked out of your place, hooking up with your gay roommate's boyfriend would be the most entertaining way to do it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
being able to look good while almost puking is a skill that takes a lot of puking to develop.
and this is why we should make december sharting awareness month.
the amount of times i have wished for a boxed wine emoticon is almost alarming. almosttt
she slipped a pinky in my ass. Not sure if I came because I liked it or if I was terrified by it.
I feel like this is going to result in some sort of tearing in my vagina.
Thats a chance were just gonna have to take
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sorry I kept grabbing your vagina at the casino. I believed it was my lucky unicorn to win bonuses
DISHONOR ON YOU. DISHONOR ON YO FAMILY. DISHONOR ON YO COW
I don't think a gay three way is the best way to confirm your sexuality.
So some drunk guy just tried to convince me with all of his passion that bacon is a color
I wanna die. I can't recall the last time I was happy that doesn't involve your hand touching my butt.
How do you say happy birthday to someone you fuck occasionally that almost got you arrested? Like what do I text.
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