If I go to jail what happens to my debt?
You dont have to pay it.
I'm going to jail.
I got called a slut by a bunch of girls that work at Hooters..wtf is that shit? explain that to me
Anything crazier than usual happen? I woke up in a stairway with my cock out.
So I thought I was doing pretty good and then I sneezed and prematurely ejaculated...
i wish every aspect of life was like a bar. flirt with the cute guy two feet across from you and get whatever you want for free
I feel so much closer to you now that I heard your poop splash into the toilet.
while cleaning my room, i've found many wonderful things. one of these is the card you gave me for my eighteenth birthday. it's a christmas card that says "i want to stick it in your sponger"
Nobody knows who the hobo or dude who whipped out his balls is
when he put a condom on for a handjob cuz he didn't want to "blow his load in the car" i started to question my choice in guys..
They need to leave so I can start drinking shamefully.
You're invited to our X-games themed party. We have an ice luge and every time someone eats shit we drink. It's gonna be great.
Well that's my green light to bang ur brother. Its not real til its on fb
Yeah I was thinking something along the lines of "I almost died, lets celebrate with sex. Come over"
It was great. Except he kept asking me to lick his butthole, I was like firm no
I think the pizza guy was in shock..
Well I didn't mean to answer the door only in socks but I mean come on, 4 hours of sex works up an appetite! I WAS RAVENOUS
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