I convinced her last night that my actual nickname was "No Condom John"
some how when im high sleep beats hunger...its like how paper beats rock it doesnt make any fucking sense but it still happens
and then when she swallowed her birth control with a shot of vodka and looked in my direction, i knew it was time to go.
it got awkward when she realized that our nickname for her was "The Hambeast"
in line at jewel. the cashier is puking in a garbage can while ringing up customers. glad to know im not the only one that 2012 is kicking in the face already.
ive cried into many a lonely burritos..
Last night we got home from the bar and saw a fox outside and we lured it in the house with a piece of cheese. Just wanted to party with some potentially dangerous wildlife I guess.
We hotboxed his closet and accidentally lit some of his shirts on fire... do we have a fire extinguisher?
So much easier to puke and rally now that my gluten's under control
we are the apple cider girls!
I grinded with the guy who brought the scooter, I'm leaving with success
You hit a new plane of existence as we all watched in awe
In my top drawer right now, there are see's chocolates, condoms, weed, and my vibrator. One way or another, this is going to be a good night
I was told that I need a reference for my blow job skills. Be expecting a phone call tomorrow.
All I want is some guy to eat me out while I work on grad school things then go on his way
Fuck I think I want to but I don't think I should. Caught between should and wanting.
just follow your vagina
Quote of the day.
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