I seriously can't date anymore I forgot how to hide my crazy
no. i seriously look so gross with this sunburn. i wouldnt even wanna bang myself. and im really into myself.
Why does everyone think all I do is drink? I go to class on wednesdays
you busted in the room, ripped the covers off of us, ... and fist pumped
Fuck him tonight for the both of us. We're still tag-teaming in spirit.
i would think by now you'd realize that my penis does whatever the fuck it wants and i have no control over the situation
I literally paid him in shots to clean my entire apartment. he even vacuumed...who said alcoholism is a bad thing??
If I don't have herpes this will be the single greatest day of my life
She's cute, but batshit. Like some kind of dominatrix disney princess.
Please tell me that chemistry equipment is for chemistry and not for producing felonies.
classified somewhere between kinky and medically inadvisable
You can achieve whatever you wish in your imagination with some help from drugs
We hooked up with 2 friends last night as always and she stole their fucking cocaine and I just had to drive to their house and make her give it back to him hahshshahahah only me
She tried to subtly measure me, but I noticed. She told me I barely made the cut otherwise there would have been just a handshake as a parting gift.
I'm disgusted with myself. Who goes down on their Uber driver? This asshole
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