I'm having a terrible night. Can I sleep over?
Too tired to pretend that I care : (
I wasn't pimping you out... I was helping you network!
he kept whispering yes yes yes yes the entire 15 minutes. i almost wish it was a quickie.
I just found a pubic hair on my dick that wasn't mine.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Im going to need an iv of taco bell after this.
So after I was tied with a feather boa he left me there with KFC and cherry coke
Old woman told me I looked like her son and then she started explaining to me how she wanted me to fuck her
we were playing waterfall, then strip waterfall, then we were just listening to music, drinking, and slowly becoming more naked
Do you think blood ever gets sick of carrying all these drugs around?
Like, there are so many different things we make it do, and it just wants to settle down and be a one-drug fluid?
Stop reading WebMD high.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He told me to be careful with the shrooms because he mostly had caps left. He sounded apologetic but that's the best news all week.
There was a trampoline and tequila. It was glorious.
he's like a horny 3rd grader on cocaine. he needs a leash
I'm a shining star this evening. Dancing with a cane in rite aid now. I should be kept under survaillance.
I love you. Doing a double. Going to die. It will be painful. Let the world know i partied. God, did i party.
Either my boss has an enormous dick or he’s hiding a can of tennis balls in his bike shorts
Maybe I will go to the company picnic
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