The Redheads category on Pornhub is my number 2 site behind facebook on google chrome. I think I have a problem
I'm not saying he was bad at sex, but I'm pretty sure I anti-climaxed.
he just kept repeating that I have nice areolas
He asked me if we could throw a lingerie party together so I guess he's single again
why is my new profile picture on Facebook one of me with a bunch of strangers on an elevator?
My password hint says "not sunset, also facebook." i need to stop doing computer things while high. I will never figure this clue out.
I slept with him because his girlfriend should know better than to be with him given is reputation. It was like sex and a lesson all in one.
Ummmm you know you're drinking vodka out of a Skittles bag, right?
I took her to the bar and boom. All of my past slump busters were there. Shes cool enough to know what that means and said she was afraid they'd eat her so we left.
Is it a coincidence that the reminder on my phone to take my birth control is "I'm ready to party" from Bridesmaids?
He sent me a blank text message. That's a booty call waiting to happen
I just slapped myself in the face with my dildo and I know that's a weird thing to share but I just had to tell to someone omg I'm laughing so hard
BTW, Julia referred to you as a power bottom. Are you available?
I know. His dick was small at the top and got bigger at the bottom, like a fucking curling wand.
Have you ever had a pregnancy test laugh at you?
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