Asian hipster sighting. About to tackle him and ask him to take me to chinatown
The Worst (noun)- 1. Getting up at 6am after a night of drinking. 2. Wearing a Peter Rabbit costume.
It was amazing what she could do with her one good arm.
When you're on the hood of a car, 10 mph feels pretty fucking fast.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
hell no. last time, i couldn't pee straight for a week.
How can you turn a kayak date down? I'M TALKING RIVER HEAD HERE.
i wanna pet his head its so fluffy. were gonna open a petting zoo
How do you feel about fucking me quick and then me leaving to go do arts and crafts?
I've got to stop giving the gift of vagina for every occasion. I'm exhausted.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Its like he woke the dragon, and the dragon is hungry for a good dick.
And if it ever comes down to tax or healthcare benefits we can get married
That's the sweetest thing I've ever heard
Sometimes I just want to serenade his penis with cheesy 80s songs.
You're like Jane Goodall in a forest of gay men. Someday your autobiography will be called "Bottoms in the Mist".
you just won the triple crown of sex! your prize is more sex.
DO NOT TOUCH THE SOAP ITS HAD SOME UNORTHODOX USES WITHIN THE PAST 15 HOURS
Randomize