yeah, but that could mean anything in Denmark.
I just punched cris angel in the balls. I have photos.
I opened my browser to a doctor page titled "serious pain under left side of ribcage". Last night must have been healthy.
and now I know what throwing up pineapple chunks is like.
Yeah, we had those soaking in vodka for like 36 hours
outstanding.
i think i am going to devote my summer to making my cats internet celebrities
Climbing onto the roof in a dress and high heeled boots was probably not the best idea, especially after all that Bacardi.
in line at jewel. the cashier is puking in a garbage can while ringing up customers. glad to know im not the only one that 2012 is kicking in the face already.
Just found the cutest bag of coke under my bed. I'm going to get fucked up and bleach the cat vomit out of my sheets.
Just watched a drunk girl hand her valet ticket to a cop and walk away.
The Supreme Court upheld health insurance. If that's not an excuse to get hospital drunk, I don't know what is.
We were having sex and my nose just started pouring blood. He reached down to the floor, grabbed a sock and held it to my nose. He just kept pounding away like nothing was happening.
I'm good. We walked you back to my apartment and you demanded to eat the sandwich I made for him
Saying I've had more balls in my mouth than you is the last clear, coherent thing I remember.
He sent me a picture of his dick as a snake, I'd say things are going great.
I already tell everyone in my office my bf is at the Naval academy. It slipped one time and I can't go back on it now
Randomize
