how's this sound. You, me a box of pink franzia and a night full of possibilities in your basemen. I'll be me. You be you. And we'll see where it goes
Last night was def like the makeout party episode of full house
Do brothers usually kiss their sisters?
I need you to promise me that the first one to find out our kids smoke weed, takes the weed so we can smoke it ourselves
if you don't go to jail tommorow I'll buy you a 40. Motivation.
I just wasted my iTunes Gift Card on a season pass for Hannah Montana. Bad decision?
No, I left myself a half eaten cucumber and a beer next to my head, pointed at it and said 'you're breakfast' and then passed out.
Earned the respect of a group of freshman by chugging Das Boot while hanging out a window and lost it shortly after by wrecking a clown bike into them.
you don't know what its like to have your bartender tell you that you owe him beer money infront of your mother at 3pm on a tuesday
It's one of those mornings where you wake up and want to go to church for the first time in ten years. THAT shameful.
Did I really drink that whole bottle of Jack Daniels last night?
Heroically.
Sooo i'm debating posing nude for the drawing and painting classes, I just wanna see if they draw my nip ring.
Is it bad that I'm not at all bothered by the fact that to some people I'm simply known as the girl that takes her shirt off?
Having sex with him is like yoga. I do it in the morning and then can't walk for three days afterwards.
I want to disappear from this job like a fart in the wind.💨
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