He asked to "fluff my boner.."
so... how was it???
he had bart simpson sheets. he had itunes on shuffle and "don't worry be happy" started playing when he took his boxers off. sad to say i was neither worried nor happy
I don't know where I am, but I'm drinkin & I like these people
I woke up hungover and reached for a glass of water only to realize too late that it was vodka sprite with my splooge in it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i have no feeling in my penis or fingers but i think it was worth it
i gave her a can of corn and told her the cabs are accepting non perishable food items over the holidays. blatant lie and she lives like $40 away
You know, it doesn't really count as a walk of shame if you guys showered together the next morning
Opened my purse to realize I have someone else's birth certificate. What happens to me in college?
I was just the victim of a drive by judging in a horse and buggy.
The fuck? Where?
St. Mary's. Amish people. Too high for this.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Honestly I have a huge freedom boner right now and if I came it would be red white and blue
I need vitamin water and Jesus :/
I don't remember much from my 21st, but my mom said I insisted on the fat guy taking body shots off me
I guess I just don't understand how the two main issues with your ex involve a cock ring and a Christmas tree
I need to reevaluate my stance on weekday hangovers...
Wanna meet at the diner for breakfast? all I've eaten in the past 24 hours is glitter and penis. starvingg.
Randomize