Ps there is totally a drug addled prostitute in olympic pizza asking for change for a 100 bill
omg... punch me in the throat... I am about to lose my mind with my parents.. I'm not saying I agree with the menendez brothers.. but I understand
I thought it was weird that her dad told me to finish and get out after he walked in on us. I like him
just gave him road head on the way home IN A SNOW STORM..good thing we didn't crash or I'd be dead. I DIDN'T HAVE MY SEATBELT ON
clearly you have your priorities straight
Disgusting. If I saw her naked my dick would pack up his balls and leave.
Are you dead or are you taking another 13 hour nap? you need to let me know these things ahead of time so i dont worry.
After your mom took her 12th and fatal tequila shot she proceeded to fall head first into the bonfire... Guess I don't have to fear getting old after all
I don't know if I should feel proud or ashamed of myself...ashamed for making myself a drink at 6:15am or proud for actually being awake that early.
Would it be weird if I congratulated the guy who almost broke up my marriage for working on the marriage equality bill? You know, thanks for fighting for the sanctity of marriage. Weird, right?
someone just got arrested on campus...
holy fuck look at all that cocaine
Yeah plus that night got so disgusting it's basically a repressed memory anyway
So I just went to clothing optional bar
I may or may not be sitting in a bubble bath drinking wine, watching Jurassic park, and wearing a Russian fur hat.
she crossed my comfort zone...i thought i was a freak
said the guy with a pink sex swing...
When I meet her I'm going to have to resist the urge of saying "hey! We're Eskimo sisters!"
Randomize
