SOME GIRL GOT MAGGOTS IN HER COOCH FROM EXPERIMENTING WITH MAYO!
we sang "a whole new world" together. either he's my gay best friend or the love of my life.
This just in: I met a girl who does the phone sex phone lines, and shes' 5'4" 320. I'll never get a hardon again through a phone.
How come ATM is perfectly acceptable, yet not washing your hands after you poo is socially reprehensible?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
And for your info. Don't pee outside with glow sticks. People will still see you.
He just asked me if I wanted a ride on the "bologna pony." I never wanna have sex again...
Drinking vodka in the bathtub.... If I don't make it, I thank you for your magical parts
I left my coke in the bird nest in the bathroom stall last night but I found it nest and all in my purse I love morning suprises
In sex ed. they really need to include a lesson on saying tampon in foreign languages, just in case.... Trying to ask the woman at the reception desk, who barely speaks English, for one just turned into an awkward game of charades.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Eh maybe I should give her a chance. Let's see where making a porno takes the friendship
Just set up my first threesome: a rapper and a Marine. Pretty sure at least 80% of girls in America hate me right now.
It's midsummers eve. A.k.a. come over so we can get drunk and wear leaf crowns
This girl I interned with got engaged today and I'm just like over here taking plan B with my tacos and PBR.
Someone is giving away free yogurt on craigslist. Can I get a ride?
Woke up to find that I was cock blocked by no more than three people.
Randomize