i don't mind that he's uncut. i like it! it's like a little sweater!
a cock doensn't need a sweater! especially a skin sweater! wtf.
That's like some buffalo bill hannibal lector shit.
are you going to last longer than 15 seconds
nope
an ex called crying about her current BF. convo ended in phone sex. i love emotional wrecks
You and I should start a club for people who woke up on outside on a bench with no idea how they got there.
i dont care if i had to wear a dress to fuck her, she was super hot and i stand by my decision
There's a sign at Bashas for 30% off of 6 bottles of wine in Friday. That seems like a personal challenge.
he told me he's been faithful to his girlfriend and is gonna try to stay that way. challenge accepted.
I want a grilled cheese and an IV
I think I reached optimum potential when I summersaulted straight into a kiddie pool.
No, earlier you attempted Jenga with everyones shoes.
it's finals week and we've been blasting country porch drinkin since 10AM. there's been like 4 tweets about hearin us on the other side of campus
I peppersprayed myself last night. Sigh.
I still have the video of you three making soup in my kitchen and asking random people for permission DURING the party, not after like usually
Don't remember, didn't happen
I HAVE THE VIDEO YOU DICK IT HAPPENED
The important thing is that she is gone, presumably back to the depths of hell from whence she came.
Jealous. I want an iud. Maybe there's a late night bodega that'll insert one for me
Come home... I’m drinking and playing with knives
Randomize
