she's got that wholesome 16 and pregnant look.
I just put a picture of what I imagine Rob's dick looks like on it on my vision board. thank you Oprah!
birth control should be required to get into college
I just watched my mom open a wine bottle with an electric drill. I have never been so proud.
Going to get yelled at but I labeled the reel "four dried up sluts decide going to the middle east to shop during a war is the best idea ever"
At the end of the night you handed the bartender a piece of paper with the word "VISA" written on it.
i'm not a hellocoptur, but youer in a dorm ans im un a dorm
An open call to all exes! i have a drunk text policy that requires i delete any and all texts after drink 3, however i have reason to believe i have done something stupid. if i have texted you that "I love you", "miss you" and/or conveyed any interest in getting back together with you in the last 24 hours i was belligerent and lying. That is all.
hey remember that mom you brought home from the bar last month... she is currently driving me back to her place. turning my phone off now.
I'd probably lick every tooth in Carly Rae Jepson's fucking mouth.
Teen Choice Awards are on if your wondering.
It's the 30 sec rule.... the worst that could happen is I could die
I declared today 'Have a Bloody Mary Naked Day'. Why? Because I'm hungover, thirsty & don't want to bother putting on clothes.
There is a car windscreen wiper in my handbag... Not my car's, not ok.
Just busted the chick who slept with my boyfriend with alcohol. God I love being an RA.
I’m going to Lewinsky this place
That makes no sense, but it sounds terrifying
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