I was hooking up with him in my car, he wouldn't stop with my nipples, I had to literally beat him off of me. He kept groaning too while he was doing it. Sick.
Mommy issues
I love how girls just decide that guys who don't like them must be gay
I do the same thing. If a girl doesn't like me...I am like, "i must be gay"
I rubbed one out into an envelope and mailed it to her. Game point, I win.
Her life must suck. All she's got is "Miss Shamrock" WHICH SHE LOST!
..i think i can hear you losing your virginity
The dean held back my hair as I was puking after graduation. That means so much more than a diploma and a handshake.
due to concerns over safety, the theme of the 'naked fondue party' has now been changed to the 'naked fondue party with optional apron' please b.y.o.apron. extra prizes for most creative apron.
Bjs on a first date are the gateway to getting to know someone for who they really are.
So take that alcohol. I still win. I ALWAYS WIN. Plus i didn't have to wear clothes. DOUBLE WIN.
Pretty sure I used toilet water to wash vomit off my face last night...
If I can ever get control of my legs I will be home. Thanks... and again sorry about your bed.
SINCE WHEN WAS USING A FROZEN WATER BOTTLE ATTACHED TO A ROPE AS A THROWING WEAPON A GOOD IDEA??
Woke up with chlamydia and a bruised rib. I'd say my boss is gonna be mad about me not showing up to work, except you know.. it's her fault.
I knew you were cut off when you tried to order a "Phil Collins"
She was topless, yelling this is Sparta, threatening to push her dad into the sewer. I am pretty sure she won't be at school.
Randomize